As parents of young adults, we have a balancing act between caring and nurturing, and allowing our kids to live their own lives as adults.  Part of being an adult is taking responsibility for our actions and decisions.  It can be challenging as a loving parent to let our children suffer the consequences of a decision, and so very tempting to rescue them! 

One method that may be helpful as we reframe our relationship as the parent of an adult is to see ourselves as a coach, mentor, or adviser.   When you find yourself in a situation where you want to tell them what to do, nag, or second guess their choices, ask them if they'd like your input.  An easy way to do this is to ask your child if they'd like some advice.  If they decline your offer, respect their wishes.  Once they realize that you aren't trying to tell them what to do, they may be more open to hearing your advice.  They may not take your advice, but that's their decision to make! 

It's really important to have empathy for your child when they make mistakes, or they don't take our advice.  Treat them as you would a good friend who made a mistake.  Don't rescue them or fix it for them, just have empathy.  "What a bummer, I'm so sorry that happened!"  Hold the "I told you so's", even if you did tell them so!  Empathy will keep the relationship open, and they be more likely to come to you for advice in the future.